Intimate relationships between human beings with a significant age gap have always existed for different reasons.In the past it might have been to ensure an heir or to attain wealth or for some it might have been love.Nowadays the reasons are really not that different.The judgments however have significantly increased.When is the age difference significant?First of all this depends largely on the two people involved but generally it has to do with the different stages of life we are going through as we age.If, for example, a teenage girl, age 14, has a relationship with a student, age 20, they might be in significantly different developmental stages of their lives with an age difference of only 6 years.If however a 30 year-old woman has a relationship with a 36 year-old man it is more likely for them to be in somewhat similar life cycles.Differences between women and men.As pointed out above, the different developmental stages largely influences whether a couple will bridge their age differences.Another aspect is that males get into their career drive in earlier years, whereas women, at least in the recent past, largely bloomed in their careers or went back to work after having children.This is responsible for the attraction in relationships of younger men with older women, for example a driven 28 year-old men who's attracted to the drive and busyness of a 42 year-old women in business attire.Father and daughter?Another interesting dynamic is the father-daughter relationship, where a man enters into a relationship with a significantly younger woman.For the man this often boosts their ego and helps them overcome a mid-life crisis or when they've recently been divorced.For the younger woman it can be a way to work through her father issues, for example if she had an emotionally or physically unavailable father when growing up.Other reasons might be to enjoy being treated and spoilt by a 'sugar daddy'.Judgments.In today's society it is unconsciously expected to live in a relationship where both partners are at approximately similar age or in similar life cycles.There are advantages to similar-age relationships and yet love does not always follow these rational reasons.Judgments in the form of 'wasn't he able to find someone his own age' or 'she sure must have money to attract such a hot young boyfriend' are often signs of jealousy, boredom or, for certain people, a way to spend their free time.Does it work?In the end there are no rules or guidelines as to what age gap is more likely to sustain over time.It is, like with many other differences, about the two people in that relationship.Can you live with the differences in interests, views, beliefs, and routines in life? And as you see this question can be asked in any relationship, no matter what age difference.
Saturday, June 23, 2012
Relationship Wisdom - Relationship With an Age Difference
Intimate relationships between human beings with a significant age gap have always existed for different reasons.In the past it might have been to ensure an heir or to attain wealth or for some it might have been love.Nowadays the reasons are really not that different.The judgments however have significantly increased.When is the age difference significant?First of all this depends largely on the two people involved but generally it has to do with the different stages of life we are going through as we age.If, for example, a teenage girl, age 14, has a relationship with a student, age 20, they might be in significantly different developmental stages of their lives with an age difference of only 6 years.If however a 30 year-old woman has a relationship with a 36 year-old man it is more likely for them to be in somewhat similar life cycles.Differences between women and men.As pointed out above, the different developmental stages largely influences whether a couple will bridge their age differences.Another aspect is that males get into their career drive in earlier years, whereas women, at least in the recent past, largely bloomed in their careers or went back to work after having children.This is responsible for the attraction in relationships of younger men with older women, for example a driven 28 year-old men who's attracted to the drive and busyness of a 42 year-old women in business attire.Father and daughter?Another interesting dynamic is the father-daughter relationship, where a man enters into a relationship with a significantly younger woman.For the man this often boosts their ego and helps them overcome a mid-life crisis or when they've recently been divorced.For the younger woman it can be a way to work through her father issues, for example if she had an emotionally or physically unavailable father when growing up.Other reasons might be to enjoy being treated and spoilt by a 'sugar daddy'.Judgments.In today's society it is unconsciously expected to live in a relationship where both partners are at approximately similar age or in similar life cycles.There are advantages to similar-age relationships and yet love does not always follow these rational reasons.Judgments in the form of 'wasn't he able to find someone his own age' or 'she sure must have money to attract such a hot young boyfriend' are often signs of jealousy, boredom or, for certain people, a way to spend their free time.Does it work?In the end there are no rules or guidelines as to what age gap is more likely to sustain over time.It is, like with many other differences, about the two people in that relationship.Can you live with the differences in interests, views, beliefs, and routines in life? And as you see this question can be asked in any relationship, no matter what age difference.
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